


The Circle

by paleredheadinascifi



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Fluff and Humor, M/M, The Circle AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-02
Updated: 2020-02-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22520374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paleredheadinascifi/pseuds/paleredheadinascifi
Summary: Message: Here is the The Circle AU no one asked for. Shrugging woman emoji. Send.Things have been going poorly enough in both David and Patrick's lives that they've ended up voluntarily signing up for a reality TV show called The Circle. David's learnt that when you refuse your parent's money on principle, you will eventually run out of money and have to lower your standards to get it. Patrick is looking anywhere and everywhere in the hopes of finding himself after breaking off his engagement, including this TV show. They're both pretty sure this was definitely a mistake, but maybe, just maybe, they've both found themselves exactly where they need to be.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 17
Kudos: 38





	The Circle

**Author's Note:**

> This is, obviously, based off of 'The Circle' - a social media reality competition series on Netflix. I don't really know if this will make sense if you haven't seen it, but I'll try to explain things as I go. See notes at the end for a brief summary of the show's concept if you'd like. 
> 
> It's a bit of a hand wave/I'm making up the production aspects, but we're all just here to have fun.

David was made for this.

As he makes his way down the dimly lit corridor towards the door with his name on it, it’s all that’s going through his mid.

_I was fucking made for this._

A social media TV show where you’re judged predominately on looks? He’s been perfecting this game for 34 years.

Sure, it was a little off-brand to stoop to the level of reality TV, that was generally more within Alexis’ repertoire, but when you find out your parents had been secretly funding your entire career and your life was a sham, you kind of just have to do what it takes. One of the producers of _The Circle_ was an old friend from college, who’d reached out in hopes that David would add a little touch of D-List celebrity to the mix. He’d played it off as if he was in it for the Instagram followers he’d gain, but the truth was he’d distanced himself from his family and, more importantly, their money, and had quite suddenly realised he’d be needing some kind of income.

He stops in front of the door to fix his hair one final time, taking a deep breath and pushing it open. Inside he finds a (surprisingly) tastefully decorated apartment reflecting his personal black and white chromatic colour palette. The décor is minimalist and chic, it’s clean and tidy and honestly, he’s kind of shocked he doesn’t completely hate it. Maybe this won’t be as bad as he thought.

The focal point of the room, apart from the barely concealed cameras pointing out of every corner of every wall, is the big flat screen TV with the show’s logo. An alarm scares the shit out of him as the logo is replaced with text.

**_Welcome to The Circle_ ** **.**

**_It’s time to set up your profile._ **

****

**_Start by choosing your profile picture._ **

David takes a seat on the white couch in front of the screen, taking in the six photo album options he can select from. They’re all different categories of photos – some are from his modelling days, some are photos with friends, there’s an album just titled “celebs” with photos of him and various famous people, and there’s the “family” album the producers had forced him to include but he’d never be picking from. David already knew which [photo](https://www.instagram.com/p/BzaQfijpU-8/) he’d be using. It was one from his most recent trip to Italy, sitting on the side of a fountain in the Villa Borghese Gardens. Because he was in Italy (when in Rome, as they say) he had adapted his colour palette accordingly, sporting a casual blue button down, taupe shorts and mustard yellow converse with his favourite pair of sunglasses. It’s a casual photo, not one from a shoot or magazine feature, but he looks appropriately fashionable and as approachable as David Rose can look. He tells the cameras as much.

The voice of one of the producers makes him jump as it squeaks through the speakers. “Hey David, that’s great, thank you! If you could just talk a bit about what your strategy is for the game while you’re setting up your profile that would be aces. Just walk us through your thoughts. Thanks man.”

“Um, okay. So my strategy here is admittedly basic. I’m playing as myself, using my name, my photos, all of the tricks I’ve picked up being surrounded by socialites.”

People generally like the surface level David, is what he’s not saying. This is where he thrives, getting by on his looks and never really letting anyone know the real him.

“My profile picture encapsulates a few things about myself: I love fashion, I love travel, I love Italy – but it’s not as intimidating as some of these more professional photos. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from my model friends, it’s the intimidation power of a well-lit studio print. In this instance, we’re not going for intimidation. I’m going for more of a ‘likeable, fashionable, queer guy who the girls want to be best friends with and the guys will either be amused by or want to fuck. So, yes, I will lock in the top left in as my profile picture, Circle.”

**_Now it’s time to tell us a bit about yourself._ **

****

The screen pops up with empty boxes for ‘name’, ‘age’, ‘relationship status’, and ‘bio’. He’s been training for this moment every time he deleted and reinstalled the five different dating apps he’s had on rotation for years – he can type out his bio with his eyes closed at this point. Instead, he dictates it to the screen and watches the words appear in front of him.

**_David: 34_ ** **. _Single. Full-time Gallerist, part-time trend forecaster. When I’m not saving my sister from hostage situations, you can find me eating my way across NYC 🍔🌈_**

If history is anything to go by, this profile should hit the sweet spot between intriguing and just relatable enough, with plenty to go off for a conversation starter.

The screen flashes up a new message confirming the profile set-up is complete before fading back to the show’s logo.

“That was great, David. Get settled into your apartment, make yourself at home, and we’ll let you know when we need you again,” the producer instructs through the screen.

And so David does just that. He unpacks his (very carefully packed) clothes, sets up his hair and skincare products in the (far too small) bathroom and assess the food situation (it’s a very well-stocked fridge). He finds himself looking for his phone one too many times, forgetting that it had to be left with the producers along with any other access to the outside world. He eventually lands on reading one of the books he’d bought with him, ‘ _How to Win Friends and Influence People’._ His therapist had suggested reading it and honestly, he kind of just thought this would be a funny time to do it.

He’s only a quarter way through the book when an alarm starts blaring through the room’s various speakers. “What the fuck!?” he squeals, jumping an embarrassing distance off the couch. The screen in front of him reads: **_Alert_**.

“My God, was that absolutely necessary?” he squawks at the nearest camera, hoping it’s a direct line to the producers.

“Sorry!” A voice squeaks through the sound system, “We’re still adjusting the volume. Sorry everyone.”

“Fuck,” David breathes, trying to slow his racing heart. It seems to take a few minutes for whoever is controlling things on the back end to get themselves together, before the alert message gives way to a new one:

**_All the players have entered The Circle. Are you ready to meet the competition?_ **

****

It seems to be waiting for a reply, so David huffs out a “yes, obviously, yes.” And the screen pops up with seven other faces along with his own profile picture he’d picked earlier.

There’s what appears to be four females and three other males, a decently diverse group at first glance. All the women are gorgeous, but way too young to be anything more than friends, which is good. David’s been told his whole life that he “looks” gay, so unless anyone asks he is planning on letting people hold whatever assumptions they want. The ‘gay best friend’ trope is problematic, but David has every intention of using it in his favour to win the prize money. After a quick glance at the girls’ profiles, he’s feeling pretty confident he knows what he’s working with and moves on to the men. There’s two athletic looking guys who obviously frequent the gym and are obviously very, very straight. One says he’s a basketball player and the other looks like he just walked off the set of Jersey Shore, but they both seem reasonably nice. The last [picture](https://www.cbc.ca/schittscreek/content/images/simply-the-best.jpg) features a man in a dark blue button down, smiling at the camera over a guitar he’s in the middle of strumming. He has the warmest brown eyes David has ever seen, and David feels something inside of him unfurl.

_Fuck_.

His smile is equally as gravitating and does a decent job of distracting from the $8 haircut and what appears to be a pair of mid-range denim jeans. He’s not a model, he’s clearly not trying to be one either, it’s exactly the type of profile photo a mother or an aunt would gush over in the comments section on Facebook. It’s working for him, though, this whole responsible-business-major-your-parents-would-love-who-also-plays-guitar vibe. David pulls up the profile and holds back a grin as his suspicions are confirmed.

**_Patrick. 29. Single. Ah, you know, just a small-town Canadian boy trying to navigate life in the city. MBA with a love of MLB, NHL and music. Go the Jays! 🇨🇦_ **

****

“Don’t forget to walk us through what you’re thinking, David,” a producer reminds him with a sigh.

“Right. Sorry,” David pulls himself out of his head, remembering to lean into his TV persona like he’s seen Alexis do a million times.

“Okay, last up we have Patrick, 29, single. He has a great smile. I think this profile picture will really work in his favour. Who doesn’t love a man who plays guitar? He’s Canadian as well, so we have something in common there, maybe a starting off point to establish a connection. He’s a business major, which, yeah, obviously, we have eyes. And he’s into sports, which I’m imagining will be something all the other guys might bond over, so I need to maybe be cautious of that,” David explains to the empty room, “but I’m still confident with my strategy. Trust me, I’ve spent enough time with hotshot sports people to fluke my way through a conversation or fifty,” he admits. It’s unfortunately true.

The screen instructs him to rank the other players based off their profiles, and something inside him makes him rank Patrick as his number one. He’s not sure why, he’s the least familiar to him, the biggest outlier in his game. He doesn’t really know this type of person, the wholesome, genuine, run of the mill Canadian boy Patrick seems to be. He’s not the type of person you’d meet at the parties and galas David frequents, and if he were there, he’s certainly not the type that would have grabbed David’s attention, but there’s _something_ about him. He has really, really nice eyes. David kind of wants to fall into them. He knows he’s probably straight, really everything about him points in that direction, so what’s the worst a little unrequited out of character crush can do?

He finds himself spending the rest of the evening day dreaming about warm eyes and a kind smile until an alert on the screen pulls him out of it.

**_Patrick has invited you to a private chat._ **

_Oh. Okay. This could get interesting._

**Author's Note:**

> Wikipedia says The Circle is: Within the show, contestants are isolated with their own apartments, and can only communicate to the other contestants via "The Circle", ostensibly a computer program which transcribes their messages into text as if in a social media app. Contestants are thus able to present completely different identities to the others to hopefully win them over. Every so often, the group of contestants are asked to rate their fellow contestants, with the top vote-getters becoming the "influencers" of the Circle, giving them the power to "block" one contestant from the circle, eliminating them from the game.
> 
> Anyway, I do love hearing your comments and thoughts. Let me know if you've got any!


End file.
